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We are all busy people

I have had many friendships through the years that either stagnated or ultimately ended due to the words: "I am just so busy". And my response to that was always: "Aren't we all?" We each get the same 24 hours a day, right?

Yes, there are degrees of busy, and I have a lot of understanding and patience for that. In fact, you might not find a person busier than me, amongst my current group of friends. However, despite every hour of every day being filled with "my own busyness", I still check in with my circle as often as I get an opportunity, or am reminded, . And I want to believe the same is true for them.

Why then will some people always be "too busy" to contact you or even make an effort to see you? Why is the cost of a phone call or a text message more expensive for them than for you? Why is it farther to travel from their house to yours, then visa versa? Well, as the movie title goes - 'I guess, they are just not that into you, hey!'

You see, here is the secret; successful relationships take time and effort. It doesn't just happen. It is hard work. It seldom comes from only one side - both parties need to want it and therefore commit to actually give of themselves to make such a relationship work. So, whether parent-child, mentor-student, spouses, siblings, friends etc... if you are the only one reaching out, remembering to call and taking the time to visit, they might just not be that into you!!

I had to come to that hard, sad realization again today. Someone whom I knew for almost 18 years, and actually considered as one of my closest friends, stopped responding to my messages a few months ago. Thinking back it's almost a year now. As a friend I got concerned, and thought she might be in distress or trouble. Going through such a season in my own life, I know how it feels and without friends to support you, it can be impossible to stay positive and at times feel unbearable. After months, I then got the "I am just too busy" response today. And with a shock discovered: 'she is just not that into me (anymore)'. Once that thought dropped to my heart, it was quite liberating. I thank God for her



and other friendships that were there for a season. I am also very grateful for all those new and old friendships that are part of my life for a reason.



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